Pregnancy Etiquette

I had heard the horror stories before – some pregnant women have total strangers come up and rub their bellies invading personal space. I however had this cute petite, fragile elderly lady give me quite the shock! I’ve seen this lady once a week for the last two years at a meeting I regularly go to every Saturday that I’m in town. She was getting out of her handicapped van, a grey-haired petite woman that was as strong-willed and she was wise – and I’m pretty sure that she’s in her early 80’s. She was moving ever-so-slowly to the door with her walker guiding her. I was holding the door for about 5 minutes as she made her way into the building - and then we talked…

Having never spoken a word to me before, she said “wow – aren’t you lucky!” And I (being a healthy 38 weeks pregnant) said, “Oh yes, my husband and I are very blessed – we are so excited!” She retorted “Oh no honey – I was being sarcastic, you are huge! You are going to have one tough delivery, and I feel sorry for you. I don’t know what you are so happy about”. All of which was said with this disdain and a scowl. (I haven’t been looked at that way since I was in 8th grade by “those girls” that just didn’t like me.) She continued “well, babies are a blessing but you better hope that baby is coming soon or you will be in real trouble”. I stood there in shock, debating if I should yank her walker out from under her and shovel kick her through the door (that has been taking way too long to get through) or if I should continue respecting my elders even when they are really rude. I opted for the latter, and she continued at a snail’s pace finally through the door – shaking her head the entire way and whispering “wow”.

I shook it off, kind of – no one ever likes to be called huge. Which brings me back to pregnancy etiquette. I haven’t had any trouble from guys, they seem to really know good boundaries when it comes to commenting on women’s looks. I’m just not sure as to why it makes sense that if a person is pregnant, that is makes it 100% ok – and apparently not at all uncomfortable for strangers to discuss her size, weight, the most personal details of her anatomy, etc. I would never dream of going up to a random person on the street and calling her “huge”. Nor would I ask her how much weight she’s gained in the last year or touch her anywhere. It’s a mystery to me how that invisible line is crossed so readily.

Anyway, I just thought I’d share this interesting story. I’ve been re-assured that I’m not huge and that really, I’m just happy to be healthy and able to carry this baby to full-term. We are blessed darn it, and I won’t let that little gremlin tell me otherwise!

As a side note – I love talking about our baby and this pregnancy with people I know – friends and family. And I’m always up for a good wishes belly rub for Sophia – that’s not it at all, it’s just the strangers that are a problem.

Stay tuned for tomorrow’s update – it’s our next doctor’s appointment and we’ll have news on the possible induction!
Love you all!